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Thursday, September 24, 2009

To Be My Husband's Wife: Part 2

If you missed part one of this story, click here.

I was finishing out my first year living back in the States, and I was excited about my first real relationship. Shortly after we started dating I enrolled in college, and began a new job at a community health center. I was working as a receptionist, and it was a very stressful, low paying job. I had a full class schedule, and I was trying to figure out how to balance a relationship, a job, and full time school.

I was trying my hardest to be independent, as I had always wanted to be. I paid my bills, got good grades, worked hard at my job. I had dreams of excelling in my career, but soon realized that I was at a dead end job that would always be stressful and frustrating. I started to see the incredible amount of energy and determination it would take to actually have this successful career, and that it would involve years of toiling away. And even then, there was no guarantee that I would "make it."

More and more I was beginning to realize that this dream I had held for most of my life was turning out to be a bit more like a nightmare. I was not miserable, but I was exhausted. I was independent, yes, but I was not invincible, apparently. I observed other women in the workplace, and noticed how many were single moms, divorcees, or simply single. I had to ask myself why that was, and I didn't like the answer.

My relationship with my childhood friend was progressing, and I was constantly amazed at what a gentleman he was and how sweet he was. When I had an exceptionally long day, he managed to sneak a note into my car to cheer me up. He brought me flowers, took care of me when I was sick, did everything he could to make my life better. People constantly commented on little things like the fact that he would always open the door for me. He too had grown up in Europe, so he was a great shoulder to cry on as I adjusted to living in the States. He understood me, and I was surprised by how much I was comforted by that.

When I imagined how my "grown up" life would be, I had always imagined myself on my own. I didn't think a man would work with the way I wanted my future to be. This man constantly surprised me. I was falling for him, in a bad way. He was kind and considerate, and he showed me another kind of “man”, one that I hadn’t considered when I planned to be independent and successful. The kind of man who could help me become a better person and who would love me for the rest of my life.~

Come back next week for the next part in this story

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